Indecent Jokes - Textintouch

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'SMS Messages on 'Indecent Jokes' Category

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SMS Message posted by Admin

1.- Wat's the diff between pulling a curtain and a panty? ANS: W... Wat's the diff between pulling a curtain and a panty? ANS: When U pull a curtain, it means tat the show is over. But pulling down a panty means IT'S SHOWTIME!
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2.- 23 useless things in a man's body 20 nails cannot be hammere... 23 useless things in a man's body 20 nails cannot be hammered 2 balls u cannot throw 1 cock cannot crow Don't laugh gals ur pussy cannot catch mouse
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SMS Message posted by Admin

3.- 5 bad things 5 BAD THINGS 2 SAY 2 A NAKED GUY 1)so dis expl... 5 bad things 5 BAD THINGS 2 SAY 2 A NAKED GUY 1)so dis explains ur car! 2)but still work,right? 3)r u cold?4)shood i get a pump? 5)so i guess dis makes me d early bird!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

4.- According 2 Chinese Docs, a WoMaN'S BoDy HaS Five RooMS: 1.F... According 2 Chinese Docs, a WoMaN'S BoDy HaS Five RooMS: 1.FACE-show room 2.BOOBS-play room 3.TUMMY-store room 4.VAGINA-men's room 5.ANUS-emergency room
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SMS Message posted by Admin

5.- Advantages of breast milk A. No need to boli B. Cat cannot s... Advantages of breast milk A. No need to boli B. Cat cannot steal C.available in attractive containers D.Liked by all age groups E.Ek Par Ek FREE
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SMS Message posted by Admin

6.- Baby Please Of all the babes ur my selection,please dont gi... Baby Please Of all the babes ur my selection,please dont giv me a rejection,my teeth are clean for ur inspection,so giv my mouth a tongue injection!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

7.- Beat me bash me bite my bum, ill whip u strip u til u cum, s... Beat me bash me bite my bum, ill whip u strip u til u cum, suck me fuck me lick me out, pull my nipples til i shout
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SMS Message posted by Admin

8.- Being a student Being a student is so much fun,wen u have d... Being a student Being a student is so much fun,wen u have degrees in playin wiv tongues,if u be my teacher in how tongues flex,we'll both graduate in hot oral sex!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

9.- Blonde Womens legs what did the blondes womens left leg say... Blonde Womens legs what did the blondes womens left leg say to the blonde womens right leg? don't know they never met!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

10.- Blondes What is the difference between blondes and traffic ... Blondes What is the difference between blondes and traffic signs? Some traffic signs say stop
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SMS Message posted by Admin

11.- BOY : May I hold your hand ?? GIRL : No thanks, it isn't hea... BOY : May I hold your hand ?? GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy
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SMS Message posted by Admin

12.- Butter Your teeth are so yellow, i can't believe it's not b... Butter Your teeth are so yellow, i can't believe it's not butter!!!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

13.- Cat and the Sausage A cat tries 2 get a sausage out of a ri... Cat and the Sausage A cat tries 2 get a sausage out of a river,but gets its paws wet,then it sees a bigger 1 but falls in!MORAL OF THE STORY?The bigger the sausage the wetter the pussy!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

14.- Cocktail Is it d whiskey dat makes u frisky.Is it d brandy ... Cocktail Is it d whiskey dat makes u frisky.Is it d brandy dat makes u randy,Is it d gin dat makes u slip in,Is it d rum dat makes u cum!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

15.- Condom factory Your birth certificate is an apology letter ... Condom factory Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.
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SMS Message posted by Admin

16.- Don't be sad... don't feel blue... Frankenstein was ugly too... Don't be sad... don't feel blue... Frankenstein was ugly too...
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SMS Message posted by Admin

17.- Down on her Knees Shes down on her knees,Eager to please,Wi... Down on her Knees Shes down on her knees,Eager to please,Wiv a throb of his nob in her gob,Wiv a tingle in his belly,his legs turn to jelly cos shes doin a fuckin good job!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

18.- Foot and Mouth mary had a little lamb,its name was little r... Foot and Mouth mary had a little lamb,its name was little ralph,its burnin in a field right now cos its got foot and mouth
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SMS Message posted by Admin

19.- Getting Old U NO UR GETTIN OLD IF 1)if ur age woz ur shoe s... Getting Old U NO UR GETTIN OLD IF 1)if ur age woz ur shoe size theyd b a mile long 2)doin it 5 times a nite means gettin up to piss 3)the only way u get a 69 is playin bingo
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SMS Message posted by Admin

20.- GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring?? BOY : ... GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring?? BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??
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SMS Message posted by Admin

21.- Hi i'm an alien i'm checking for some chicks in your phonebo... Hi i'm an alien i'm checking for some chicks in your phonebook searching..... searching..... searching..... sorry no chicks found. conclusion, your are gay!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

22.- Hickory, dickory, dock Hickory, dickory, dock,dis bitch woz... Hickory, dickory, dock Hickory, dickory, dock,dis bitch woz suckin me cock,da clock struck 2,i dumped me goo,& dropped her at da end of da block
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SMS Message posted by Admin

23.- Horny Roses are red, voilets are corny, when i think of you... Horny Roses are red, voilets are corny, when i think of you babes it makes me so HORNY!!!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

24.- How many letters How many letters are in the Alphabet?? Nin... How many letters How many letters are in the Alphabet?? Nineteen. Because ET went Home on a UFO and the FBI went after him!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

25.- I once had a One2One with a virgin, she teased me till i had... I once had a One2One with a virgin, she teased me till i had an Erikson, sucked me till my face went Orange, till busted my Siemen all over her Nokias!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

26.- I really, deeply wish tat u r here wif me in my room, on my ... I really, deeply wish tat u r here wif me in my room, on my bed & lights is off & we get under the cover together.. 2 show u my.. new watch tat glow in the dark
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SMS Message posted by Admin

27.- i went for a walk with my uncle jim, when somebody threw a t... i went for a walk with my uncle jim, when somebody threw a tomato at him, tomatos dont hurt i replied with a grin. they fucking well do when theyre still in the tin.....
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SMS Message posted by Admin

28.- Ive got a tongue that'll blow ur mind let me hit u wid a 69 ... Ive got a tongue that'll blow ur mind let me hit u wid a 69 kiss me, caress me, slowly undress me I may seem defenceless, but baby I can fuck u senseless.
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SMS Message posted by Admin

29.- Kiss Me Kiss's r blown + kiss's r wasted kiss's rnt kiss's ... Kiss Me Kiss's r blown + kiss's r wasted kiss's rnt kiss's unless they r tasted, kiss's spread germz + germz hated, so kiss me BABE im vacinated!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

30.- Life is like a dick Life is like a dick! When it's hard Fuc... Life is like a dick Life is like a dick! When it's hard Fuck it!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

31.- Little Girl When i was a girl,i had a little quim,i sat upo... Little Girl When i was a girl,i had a little quim,i sat upon my bed & put a finger in,now im a woman & full of grace & charm,I can get 4fingers in & HALF MY FUCKIN ARM!!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

32.- Love & War LETS PLAY WAR!! You lay down and i'll blow the s... Love & War LETS PLAY WAR!! You lay down and i'll blow the shit out of you!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

33.- Marriage A man woz arranged 2 b married!He had a choice of ... Marriage A man woz arranged 2 b married!He had a choice of 3 women!1st woz a rich docter,2nd woz a poor cleaner & 3rd woz a prostitute!WHO DID HE PICK?The 1 wiv big tits!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

34.- Mary had a little lamb Mary had a little lamb,she kept it i... Mary had a little lamb Mary had a little lamb,she kept it in da backyard,wen she took her panties off,his wooly dick got hard!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

35.- Mary Stinks Mary had a smelly minge with pubes as dark as c... Mary Stinks Mary had a smelly minge with pubes as dark as charcoal.So most the men go round the back and stick it up her arsehole!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

36.- Mary's bike Mary had a little bike,she rode it bak 2 front,... Mary's bike Mary had a little bike,she rode it bak 2 front,all the time the wheels went round the spokes went up her cunt
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SMS Message posted by Admin

37.- Mary's bush Mary Mary, quite contrary, trim that pussy its ... Mary's bush Mary Mary, quite contrary, trim that pussy its too damn hairy!!!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

38.- Mary's Duck mary had a little lamb she also had a duck, she... Mary's Duck mary had a little lamb she also had a duck, she put them on the mantlepiece to see if they would fuck
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SMS Message posted by Admin

39.- Mary's Lambs Mary had 2 little lambs their names were Jack ... Mary's Lambs Mary had 2 little lambs their names were Jack and Gypsy. One day they got foot and mouth and now they're black and crispy.
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SMS Message posted by Admin

40.- Men like toilets Y MEN R LIKE TOILETS 1)dey r always out of... Men like toilets Y MEN R LIKE TOILETS 1)dey r always out of order 2)dey stink 3)the nice ones r always engaged 4)dey consume large amounts of liquid 5)r constantlt full of shit!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

41.- My Roof? last night I lay in my bed looking at the beautifu... My Roof? last night I lay in my bed looking at the beautiful stars, the moon and the sky.... then I thought where the fuck is my roof??
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SMS Message posted by Admin

42.- NewsFlash NEWSFLASH Tell ALL your female friends that i c... NewsFlash NEWSFLASH Tell ALL your female friends that i can get 1000 tampons for ?1, No Strings attached but for a limited period ONLY! Its A bloody good deal !
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SMS Message posted by Admin

43.- NEWSFLASH:) Earthquake in Pakistan...50,000 dead...U.S.A sen... NEWSFLASH:) Earthquake in Pakistan...50,000 dead...U.S.A sending money, France sending food, Britain sending replacement paki's!!!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

44.- Nutella I love when you stick your little fingers in me dee... Nutella I love when you stick your little fingers in me deep and lick it all . Love always , Nutella.
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SMS Message posted by Admin

45.- Old Days in days of old wen knights were bold + condoms wer... Old Days in days of old wen knights were bold + condoms wernt invented they tied socks around their cocks + people like u were prevented.
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SMS Message posted by Admin

46.- Operator This is your mobile operator and we just found out... Operator This is your mobile operator and we just found out you are too dumb to use your phone, so please put it on ground and start jumping on it . Thank you
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SMS Message posted by Admin

47.- Oral sex Oral sex can b so fine,wen u do a 69,u start 2 sha... Oral sex Oral sex can b so fine,wen u do a 69,u start 2 shake,moan & quiver,den u cum just like a river,den u lick it up in vain,wipe ur lips and start again!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

48.- Pair of tights? HOW MANY ANIMALS CAN U FIT IN A PAIR OF TIG... Pair of tights? HOW MANY ANIMALS CAN U FIT IN A PAIR OF TIGHTS? 10 little piggies,2 calves,1 ass,1 pussy,1 beaver,loads of hares & 1 smelly fish!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

49.- Peter, Peter, Pumpkin eater Peter, Peter, Pumpkin eater,had... Peter, Peter, Pumpkin eater Peter, Peter, Pumpkin eater,had a wife & liked to beat her,smacked her twice around da head, Fucked her arse & went 2 bed!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

50.- Pringles Sex is like a pack of Pringles! Once you pop, you ... Pringles Sex is like a pack of Pringles! Once you pop, you can't stop!!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

51.- Question Time Q)wot do u get wiv nuts on ur wall? A)walnuts... Question Time Q)wot do u get wiv nuts on ur wall? A)walnuts Q)wot do u get wiv nuts on ur chest? A)chestnuts Q)wot do u get wiv nuts on ur chin? A)a mouth full of cock!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

52.- Rainbow Zippy & Bungle,went 2 da jungle havin sum marvelous... Rainbow Zippy & Bungle,went 2 da jungle havin sum marvelous fun, Zippy got silly,popped out his willy & stuck it up Bungles bum!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

53.- RECIPE 4 LUV CAKE:spread legs,squeeze + massage milk pots,ch... RECIPE 4 LUV CAKE:spread legs,squeeze + massage milk pots,check frequently with midfinger,add banana,work in-out till well
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SMS Message posted by Admin

54.- satisfy a woman HOW 2 SATISFY A WOMAN; caress, excite, cudd... satisfy a woman HOW 2 SATISFY A WOMAN; caress, excite, cuddle, fascinate, spoil, kiss, rub, tease, pamper, console, worship, respect & love.HOW 2 SATISFY A MAN; blow job
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SMS Message posted by Admin

55.- sex is a sensation. It's about a man's temtation, putting hi... sex is a sensation. It's about a man's temtation, putting his location in a woman's destination. Do you understand the explanation or do you need a demonstration?
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SMS Message posted by Admin

56.- Sex+drugs Sex+drugs+rock+rave,lets get drunk & misbehav,on ... Sex+drugs Sex+drugs+rock+rave,lets get drunk & misbehav,on weed+speed +little e's,well get drunk & talk 2 trees,u only live once & den u die,so fuck em all & lets get high!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

57.- Sex, Drugs + Birthcontrol Sex, Drugs, Rock and Roll Speed, ... Sex, Drugs + Birthcontrol Sex, Drugs, Rock and Roll Speed, weed and birthcontrol,lifes a bitch, then u die, so fuck the world lets get high..
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SMS Message posted by Admin

58.- Sheep Group of sheep in field, one says i dont feel well. T... Sheep Group of sheep in field, one says i dont feel well. The others reply shut the fuck up your get us all shot.
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SMS Message posted by Admin

59.- Tampons whats the difference between a mini tampon..a middl... Tampons whats the difference between a mini tampon..a middle tampon and a large tampon?....they r all stuck up cunts!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

60.- The Truth QUESTION)Wots the difference between ur job & ur ... The Truth QUESTION)Wots the difference between ur job & ur girlfriend? ANSWER)ur job always sucks!!!!!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

61.- This sms can only be read by a SEXY person: Try again...... ... This sms can only be read by a SEXY person: Try again...... Nothing? Sorry, i guess your just not SEXY..HEY! dont force it, ugly git!!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

62.- This Way Up Pleas turn your mobile phone upside down now!!!... This Way Up Pleas turn your mobile phone upside down now!!! Hurry 370HSSV 0773H
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SMS Message posted by Admin

63.- Triplets or Twins I want triplets, You want twins, Lets get... Triplets or Twins I want triplets, You want twins, Lets get in bed and see who wins!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

64.- U and the Pope do u know what's the diference between U get... U and the Pope do u know what's the diference between U geting laid, and the pope geting laid?? if the pope gets laid, it's a sin, and if U get laid, its a miracle!! :)
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SMS Message posted by Admin

65.- Virginity Virginity is like a balloon, one prick and it's g... Virginity Virginity is like a balloon, one prick and it's gone forever!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

66.- What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? If we d... What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? If we don't get some support people are going to think we're nuts!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

67.- Why are women like parking spaces?... Bcoz the good ones are... Why are women like parking spaces?... Bcoz the good ones are always taken and the rest are all disabled!
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SMS Message posted by Admin

68.- Yo Mama Yo mama's so ugly, even the elephant man paid to se... Yo Mama Yo mama's so ugly, even the elephant man paid to see her.
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SMS Message posted by Admin

69.- Yo mama's so ugly, even the elephant man paid to see her.... Yo mama's so ugly, even the elephant man paid to see her.
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